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Are We Too Critical?

January 31, 2013 — Leave a comment

La condition humaine au 21ème siècle NYC.andre via Compfight

I recently saw a documentary about heckling and criticism that made an incredible impact on me and I really started to think about how critical our society has become.  It also reminded me that I need to be more aware of how I talk to people and express my opinions.

When I saw this movie, I was reminded about many of the conversations that I have had with other people and how poorly I communicated my criticism of their work/ideas.  I am not proud of those moments, and looking back with 20/20 vision, I would like to think that I would handle them differently.  But I still make those mistakes from time to time.  I think we all do.

I think that we all have the capacity to forget that the people BEHIND the avatars online or the movies and books we read have emotions.  When the need arises and we have to criticize someone’s work, we can forget that there is a fine line between giving our opinions and crushing someone’s feelings.

Check out this trailer for Heckler (available on Netflix - affiliate link)

I know that are going to be times when you have to provide your opinion on an idea or piece of work, and you should always be honest, but honest criticism does not always have to be harsh or negative.  Any criticism you give should always be tempered with the other person’s emotions in mind.

Simple Solution to Provide Criticism of Someone’s Work / Ideas

1. Always Provide Honest and Direct Feedback

2. Your Feedback Should Also Include Suggestions to Make Improvements

3.  Before and After Your Speak…LISTEN to What the Other Person Has to Say

4.  Follow Up Afterwards to Provides Support and Encouragement

I know that all this MAY sound a little Politically Correct, but if it’s all about relationships we have to work at communicating or dislikes as easily as our likes…and not steamroll over people’s feelings in the process.

Are We TOO Critical?

From Twitter and Facebook to Blogs and Websites, the Internet has allowed millions of people the opportunity to become self-proclaimed critics.  And all too often, to seek polarity and page hits, their reviews go negative.  But it doesn’t have to be this way.

I have a friend, Lou, he is a blogger and he is one of the most positive people I know! His posts are positive, his podcasts are positive and his tweets are positive.  It’s just how he chooses to live.  Even when someone wrongs him, he stays positive.  Trust me on that one…

Our culture THRIVES on negativity.  Listen to the political pundits (on BOTH sides) during the last Presidential Campaign.  When was the last time you heard one of them say “I think that the only way this candidate can win is to go POSITIVE?”

Negativity is everywhere: newspapers, magazines, blog posts, tweets, updates… We have become a harsh society.  Because it’s so easy to be this way.  It takes a lot of work to stay positive and communicate with grace and poise.

It may sound old fashioned, but the Golden Rule still applies…  Treat others as you would like to be treated.  From the living room to the board room, it’s still the best advice around!

It’s Time to Step Back and Think

I think we should all take a few minutes and self-evaluate the conversations we are having and try to find ways to improve the WAY we communicate to our friends, families, and co-workers.

If our culture is to blame for all this negativity…it’s time to change the culture.  We are responsible for the words we say and the way in which we speak.  It’s time to take back the our culture and change the way we communicate.

We must choose to be positive.  I am tired of the negative talk…  It’s all up to us…. Will you join me?

What’s the most negative this you have ever seen or read?

Self Portrait As A Stressed-Out Bride To Be

Brittney Bush Bollay via Compfight

Dr. Cindy Ackrill, from the American Institute of Stress and also the President of Wellspark, talks to Katie Couric about the signs of stress and what we can do to control it.


Stress is responsible for 70%-90% of all doctors visits! According to Dr. Ackrill there are 4 Positive Ways to Deal with Stress in Our Lives:

1.  Sleep – sufficient sleeps helps our bodies regroup and refresh!

2.  Exercise - releases chemicals that counter the cortisoles that stress releases

3.  Healthy Diet – we need good fuel for our bodies

4.  Meditation – when we spend time to calm our system, we can reset our system

I’m going through this process now…doctors have discovered a retinal problem in my left eye due to excessive stress.  I have to cut down on caffienecut out chocolate, and learn to meditate and relax, or else I could lose my center of vision in my left eye.  All because of the stress in my life.

It’s time we all learn to relax and manage the stress we all struggle with!

What tips can you share about how you deal with stress?

 

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What is this ONE, SIMPLE CHANGE?  The answer is so very simple….

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