friendships Posts

How Many Friends Do You Have?

How many friends do you have? I think it’s a fair question that we should all ask ourselves periodically.  I don’t mean Facebook friends or Twiiter followers… I mean real, flesh-and-blood friends that you interact with on a fairly regular schedule?

Out searching for the droids

Kristina Alexanderson via Compfight

I am constantly reminded that the people I tweet/message/text.etc. are real and that I should actually talk to them more than I connect with them digitally.  But as I integrate more and more technology into my daily routine, I struggle with the fact that I have less and less physical or often emotional contact with the people I care about.

Is this something that you struggle with?

As I grow older, I have begun to realize how important my family and friends are to me.  After the recent accident (I fell 12 feet and landed on concrete) I feel much more passionately about the relationships I have in my life and value them even more.  I guess the fear that I might have died woke me up to some apathy I had towards my friends.

Is this a problem for you?  I would love to know how you balance your “real” relationships versus the “virtual” ones.  What do you do to connect with people on a deeper level?  I would love to know.  It seems cold, in light of this post, but please leave me comment or even email me!

If it’s all about relationships, in today’s mile-a-minute culture how do we have real, vibrant friendships?

I saw this video recently and it made a profound impact on me.  I’d love to know what you think about it.

A New Way to Be Thankful This Thanksgiving

vegan thanksgiving

Megan via Compfight

With Thanksgiving tomorrow, many people are talking about being thankful for what they have in their lives, and that is great!  I think that we can all stand to be a little be more grateful for how we have been blessed or how we have been rewarded for our hard work.  But all too often, we only remember to thank the people in our lives only on holidays, or worse yet, only when something goes tragically wrong.

A New Way to be Thankful

That’s why I am suggesting that we learn a new way of being thankful.  We should be thankful for the people in our lives, the people we like, and the ones with dislike. Let me explain…

It’s easy to be appreciative of the people we like and love…there’s no work involved.  We are most likely in a positive relationship and have no major hurdles to cross.  We love/like them because it easy and they make us feel good.

But it’s much harder to appreciate those people whom we dislike: the rude co-worker, the uncaring friend, the jerk who just cut us off on the highway, because it takes so much effort to tolerate, let alone like them.

I would argue that it’s the people that we struggle with that help us grow the most.

Here is a prime example

I once had a boss who set himself above everyone in every way possible: on the job, in friendships, and even in private conversations.  And i really struggled with the job because of his actions.  Until one day a good friend of mine reminded me that it’s the difficult people that help you grow the most and my responsibility was to make the relationship work for me and for him.

Once I realized that I was also responsible to make the relationship work, I rolled up my sleeves and got to work.  I chose to be more patient and found ways to exist in the work space without allowing it to consume me.

I also found outlets for my frustration and anger when I felt to overwhelmed with the situation. Often I would ride bike or take batting practice.  It’s amazing how much better you feel when you hit home runs as opposed to hitting something else!

How Does That Help?

In the example above, the only changes made was my way of thinking and how I chose to react.  I had to change myself to better handle a bad situation.  In other words, the people you like are easier, yes, but the people you struggle to like make you better.

People who are hard to like make you work a little harder, and in the end, makes you a better person!

So this Thanksgiving be thankful for not only the stuff, but for the people in your life…all of them..the ones you like AND the ones you struggle with.  Because in the end, they BOTH make you a better!

4 Ways People are a Lot Like Plants

Relationships fascinate me.  I’m that guy who sits for hours at the mall and watches people walk by (not in the creepy-dude sorta way) and I wonder about what their lives are like.  What kind of relationships they have and if they are good, healthy ones or bad, unhealthy ones.  And on one of these days I had an epiphany…