How To Stop Living Your Life On Autopilot

How To Stop Living Your Life On Autopilot

Personal Development, Relationships

How To Stop Living Your Life On Autopilot

If you find yourself doing the same routine day after day, never remembering what you did the day before, having nothing to look forward to, living your life – but never enjoying it or anything in it…you are probably living your life and the relationships in it on autopilot.

The really devastating part about living life on autopilot, especially when it comes to your relationships, is that you don’t even know that you’re doing it half the time. You’re just living your life, wishing for more, but not really sure if there is more or how to get it.

While many people live out their entire lives on autopilot (which is truly sad), the way to have truly rewarding and successful lives & relationships is to be totally aware and adaptable when it comes to life.

So, how do you do that?

1. Stop and smell the roses (literally:). Take time to notice all the little things around you that you always use to look at when you were 6!

2. Think about your short and long-term goals. Do you still have those? And if so – have you forgotten them? Re-write that list and start working on accomplishing your next short-term goal.

3. Remember your relationship? When was the last time you did something new with him/her? When was the last time you even wanted to? Start thinking about your relationship and stop just “being in it”.

4. Finally, if you are on autopilot there’s a reason why. Your life is out of balance. It’s either too stressful, too complicated, too boring, or you have surrendered your life to the “routine”. Take one day this week and really think about your life. Your relationship. How can you shake things up? Make them interesting? How can you get back in balance and in love with your life again?

If you need help with re-balancing your life, you may want a consultation with me. Contact me over on the side bar.


7 Ways To Have A Great Day

7 Ways To Have A Great Day

Leadership, Personal Development, Relationships

Life can be interesting. Each day has the capacity to be amazing or it can be a series of unfortunate events.  People can be in bad moods, situations can go wrong, and sometimes accidents simply happen.  No matter what the circumstances, whether this day is a success or failure depends on your outlook.


Some people have the ability to succeed no matter if the day is good or bad. These people have the ability to stay positive no matter what.  They are grateful for all they have and they possess an incredible attitude.  And when things go wrong, they seem to simply react better.

So when you find things are not going your way and you discover yourself dipping into negative thinking, here are 7 ways to have an attitude of gratitude and ensure you have a great day!

Decide when you wake up that it will be a great day!  This helps you start the day in a better mood and sets the tone for the day.

Start a gratitude journal, or add a gratitude list to you existing journal.  This keeps everything you are thankful for close at hand.

Look to learn from mistakes.  Write down any thoughts on how you could have handled the situation better so you can be more successful next time you find yourself in the same situation.

Choose to look at the positive side of every situation.  You have the ability to choose, use it!

Assume good will in every personal interaction you have. If you go into a situation thinking it will be positive, you will have an affect on its outcome.

Give compliments freely. This helps you keep your perspective and attitude in the right position.  And helping someone else feel better about themselves helps you in return.

Before you go to sleep, remind yourself, no matter what happened, that it was a great day and tomorrow will be better.  Set yourself up for success the night before.

Doing these things consistently will help you have more and more great days, feel better, and make you be awesome!

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Riding the Roller Coaster of New People in Your Life [Podcast]

Riding the Roller Coaster of New People in Your Life [Podcast]

podcast, Relationships


So, you are living your life and in comes a new person. This person can be a potential friend, business partner, or maybe a possible love interest. Whatever the category they may fall into, we are optimistic about them, and we give them instant goodwill. We see the good things about them and then make many other assumptions

In this week’s Real Life Podcast, hosts John and Lou discuss the ups and downs of new relationships in our lives, the expectations we put on ourselves, other people, the new relationship itself!

In this episode we discuss:

  • What the up side and down side of relationships are.
  • How our visual critique of someone guides our feelings about them.
  • How and why we place complete strangers up on emotional pedestals when we meet them.
  • What happens to the relationship when we discover other people are just like us.
  • How to deal with new people in our lives in a healthy way.

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Our favorite part of doing these podcasts is participating in the conversation they provoke. Each week, we ask one question. This week, it is this:

What draws you to like new people when you meet them?   Share your answer on Facebook, Twitter, or LinkedIn.

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About Us

louLou Carfizzi holds an Masters in Professional Counseling from Liberty University.  Lou has 14 years experience as a therapist working with families, individuals, adolescents, and providing technology based therapeutic solutions and has extensive experience treating a wide variety of disorders and situations through his practice at

Discover More About Lou Carfizzi, MA LPC


unnamedJohn C. Donahue is a blogger, writer, speaker with a focus on leadership and personal development.  Having spent over 2 decades in occupational ministry and the business world, John shares his insights and experiences providing encouragement, motivation and direction on his blog

Discover More About John C. Donahue

We’re Only Human, Learn From Mistakes

We’re Only Human, Learn From Mistakes

Leadership, Personal Development

No matter how hard you try, you are likely to make some sort of mistake today. You may forget to take out the trash, accidentally cut someone off in traffic, forget to file an important document at work, or forget to pick up milk at the grocery store.  Mistakes happen.


Keeping that in mind, here are three very important items you should focus on today:

  • You are human, you will probably make a mistake at some point. Hopefully it will be a small error and easily fixable.
  • It’s O.K. to make mistakes.  It’s human nature and sometimes, they just happen no matter how hard we try.
  • When you make a mistake, you should always learn from it. Take the opportunity to dissect why the mistake happened and figure out what went wrong so the next time you can make a better decision or choice.

We are foulable creatures and mistakes often find us, many times at the worst possible moments.  After the initial embarrassment is over and we take the emotion out of the situation, the truth is when an error occurs, it’s typically not the end of the world.

When a child makes a mistake, we encourage them and tell them that it is ok and to “do better next time.”  Somewhere in our growth into adulthood, we lost that understanding.

Making mistakes is part of the learning process.  Just because you are an adult doesn’t mean the learning should stop!

When you mess up you have a golden opportunity to learn a new fact or new idea or system to better handle the situation next time.  We can grow as individuals and in relationship with others.

Nobody sets out to make mistakes but when they happen, we should remember that we are only human. It’s understandable and we should always strive to learn something from what went wrong.  So go out there today and give it your best, and if you fall short, stand up, dust yourself off, and try again!

And don’t forget to choose to be awesome.